more from
Remote Control
We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Sleepless

by Sui Zhen

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    Purchasable with gift card

      $1 AUD  or more

     

1.
Sleepless 13:01
Part one Fog enters my room at night And I can feel it filling up my lungs Sleep won’t find me tonight So I go out on my own Pain builds in my chest And I need to feel it Light pours in my window And it hurts my eyes to see The day outside Knowing that I won’t enjoy anything I find Fog goes in my room at night And I can hardly hold myself Lost in my memory Of myself Before I lived Part two When I was a child my mother used to say Your hands are elegant and slender, not like your sisters, who inherited roundness from your father, you could be a hand model with those hands. ~ Like a dream I wondered about all the things I would touch if I were a hand model. TVs, Computer screens Miscellaneous electronics Shampoo Two-in-one A bar of soap Soapy suds ~ Like a dream A meal at home Tonight, chicken A crisp apple A stained nappy Advertisements like this When I was a child It looked like an option To be on TV A way of life To be on TV Now, we bow to other screens In your pocket On the toilet The first moments of waking The last images before sleep When I was a child, I didn’t dream or aspire to this And now I could be in a game and live forever When I was a child, I thought I had broken my leg from playing video games. Sat on my knees, I’d been playing all day And when I went to stand up, they gave away I screamed, but much to my disappointment They were only asleep Nothing dramatic ever seemed to happen. And yet, my whole childhood was Like a dream ~ Like a dream, where I come from Like a dream Like a dream ~ Like a dream, where I come from Like a dream My whole childhood ~ Like a dream My whole childhood ~ Like a dream My whole childhood ~ Like a dream Am I no longer a dreamer? Where in this world is there space for my dreams? And if my dream is common, is it my own - Or some kind of collective necessity I misplaced my dreams In the space between Innocence and tragedy Knowing that some things are simply beyond control Does your dream involve fixing things? A broken system A morally bankrupt thread A bad apple Does your dream involve writing wrongs Taking something back Rewinding time before things happen To your loved ones To your culture To the things you can no longer see, hold or touch Do you sleep enough to dream? ~ Come to mother Come to me ~ Come to mother Come to me ~ Come to mother Come to me Scrolling on my phone Looking for connection All alone, seeking some direction Seems they’ve got my images They got them all Think they can map my memories Do they know it all? Just like Jane Says, nothings shocking! Scrolling on my phone Searching for identity All the TV shows, pretend to catch up with me How many generations to get it back Assimilation still lives in the roots of me So come one everybody Sleeping bodies Heavy in your mourning For those days Come on everybody Restless bodies Clear in our hope A dream to come

about

Sui Zhen’s ‘Sleepless’ is a song about grief and persevering through it. The track was first conceived in 2018, as a stream-of-consciousness response to her mother’s passing. The catharsis of musical improvisation served as a refuge, a way to navigate the fog of sleepless nights and immense pain. Since then, the track has evolved gradually, transforming through reiteration and further losses – particularly the tragic death of her newborn son in 2021.

At 13 minutes, the piece stretches out like a horizon, more a landscape than a song, mirroring the way grief warps our perception of time. Influences like Sheila Chandra’s ‘Out on My Own’, Can’s ‘Tago Mago’ and Durutti Column’s ‘Fidelity’ have made their presence felt in the recording. Spoken word incantations and melodic hooks weave into pulsing synths, distortion and a mix of live and electronic percussion embracing Sui Zhen’s signature raw emotion and vulnerability.

In the artist’s words: “I could use my voice against the backdrop of beats and bass without needing it to take the shape of words. I would let my sorrow take centrestage”. The self-reflexive lyrics traverse the experience of loss and healing, offering solace to others facing grief, both personal or collective.

credits

released March 7, 2024

Written, composed, performed and produced by Becky Sui Zhen on Wurundjeri Woi Wurrung, Wadawurrung and Gadubanud Country.

Becky Sui Zhen: Voice, lyrics, Juno-60, Korg-M1, electric guitar, production and arrangement. Casey Hartnett: Yamaha CS1, Therevox synths. Liv Jansz: Bass guitar.
Jay Blynn: Bass guitar & effects. Andrew Noble: electronic drums, Korg Minilogue.
Phil Stroud: Live kit drums.
Mixing, additional production & arrangement by Nao Anzai at Rolling Stock Recording Rooms. Other recording took place in Airey’s Inlet in 2020, Brunswick East 2021 to 2022 and Fall Back Studios in 2019 with Haima Marriott.

Many thanks to all the players who helped to evolve the piece into what it is today; Casey, Andrew, Jay, Liv & Phil - the many jams I have had with you have meant so much to me. Thanks also to the audiences at live shows - you inspired something new in the piece each time you engaged with it, thank you for listening.

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Sui Zhen Melbourne, Australia

Sui Zhen examines loss on multiple levels, from the death of loved ones to the widespread societal tendency to disappear within the 1’s and 0’s of modern life's tech-driven rush. Her latest track 'Sleepless' was written between the death of her mother and the death of her first born son. Despite the weight it carries, it is a testament of emotional liberation in the face of adversity. ... more

contact / help

Contact Sui Zhen

Streaming and
Download help

Shipping and returns

Redeem code

Report this album or account

Sui Zhen recommends:

If you like Sui Zhen, you may also like: